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I had made 2 trips to the car already when he said he wanted to talk.... After much persuasion
and tears I agreed... I sat calmly on the bucket as he adjusted himself in the desk chair... I had
noticed when I got there he was completely dressed wearing his horizontally striped shirt, denim
shorts, socks, and sandals...
He started out by reminding me of my last suicide attempt, how I had overdosed and he had called me
and told me what I wanted and needed to hear, so I called the ambulance, that was the day he
'saved my life' and according to what he was telling me that is what I must do for him now, but I
tell him like I have been that its over, that I don't love him anymore, that we'll never be together &
that I cannot give him the 'chance' that he gave me...his look changes I see it in his eyes even
before he stands up... I'm scared...I feel his fist hit my face, such power, such force I can no
longer see his eyes... I’m on the ground now he's still hitting me but he’s kicking me now too...
I'm screaming...I'm crying...I hurt so much...I'm thinking trying to figure out why I put myself
here, why did I come, I knew it was a setup, what was I thinking...Why am I here?
It's been about 5 minutes now. He's not getting enough out of this, he stops, he grabs my hair, I'm
being dragged through the hallway....past the bathroom, past the living room, he's turning into the
kitchen, he slams me into the dresser and turns to look down at me I see his eyes, he no longer
has the tears, the fear, or any sanity. He drags me further slamming me into the chair then the
table as we approach the counter on the far wall..
He looks down at me again with the same fearless and cold eyes.. eyes I've looked into a 1000
times and never saw this all the times he’s hit me I've never seen this...I know what’s coming as
he reaches for the drawer...I'm still struggling to get free...
He has me on the ground still holding my hair tight opening the drawer, I see the knife come out I
remember its a new one small but sharp... I bought it as a gift for him it was part of a set that he
had mentioned wanting... I'm screaming still... I'm telling him what he wants to hear "Shen
please....." he's stabbing me now, "O Gawd No" where ever he can reach, "Gawd Help Me" in the
stomach first then my arms, "Please Gawd stop" He doesn't like this knife... "Shen please I'll do
anything" He grabs another "Baby please...." its bigger the blade in 7 inches easy "I'll stay with
you forever" he says I'm lying, He goes for my face "Shen please I'll do anything" he's stabbing
harder, I'm trying to block him and I'm holding the blade in my hand it tearing my hands and I'm
trying to kick him I'm still screaming, gawd can't anyone hear me.....He's irritated this knife isn't
working I bleeding every where...I feel every cut, I feel like I'm dying, the room is spinning, my
vision is blurred by the blood, I can barely talk, breathe, or see... He's got another knife easily 9
inches.... He stabbing harder and faster... I’m still just screaming...He's making me stand pulling
me to my feet by my hair... I'm eye level now 'I have to get out' My heart is still pounding He is
still trying to slice my throat, left to right then right to left I feel the blade on my throat it stings...
I try to run.... He has a good grip I struggle... I get him turned around...he's still stabbing me...I'm
trying to get to the door I've got the door knob in my hands he’s already caught me he's leaning
on the door, he reaches behind and locks the dead bolt.. he starts stabbing me again I tell him "I'll
stay" "I'll stay with you forever" "I'll give you anything you want" He tells me I'm lying...He says I
need to go into the kitchen and get a knife or there won't be any stopping I tell him I can't see If
he wants me to have a knife he has to get it... He says I better do it, or I'm going to die...again I
try "I can't...I can't see" He raises the knife again I try to prepare for the next cut, but it doesn't
come He's cutting himself now...I see the knife has broken, this should make him get another
instead he slices again at his own throat...I'm screaming again "Baby please stop" He wants to
know if its cutting, trying to get him to get another knife I tell him its not, he just tries harder, 'I
have to get out' I look to the window with its curtains and blinds its shut as usual... I turn run the
small distance and jump into the window, I'm almost out.. I'm stuck glass all around the tree is
blocking me I can barely move I'm so dizzy I've lost so much blood, I struggle free using the tree
to pull my self out of the window and to stand I'm looking at the door expecting to see it open
and him standing there but there’s nothing and no one... I’m out...
I start to run, I'm so slow its hurts so much I see that my foot is sliced open I hadn't noticed it till
now, I'm holding my hand its sliced open too, I slowly run past the car into the carport I'm afraid
to look back, I don't know if he's there...I run past the carport I'm barefoot running to the next set
off apartments, I finally look back, no one is there... I go to the first door I'm pounding on it no
one comes I go to the next then the next finally a man answers.....
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